Monday, August 25, 2008
an update. in a few sentences.
i had my first day of class and loved it! (i have so many books i don't know what to do with them all!)
God's growing me exponentially (which is mostly why i haven't been writing; i've been having to process a TON of stuff)...sometimes i wish He would choose someone else to pour His infinite knowledge into :)
there's been some boy drama, but God knows what He's doing so i'm giving up and letting Him do His thing.
i got 100's on my first two quizzes (one in old testament, the other in history of ideas).
i was offered an unpaid internship for the student ministry at my amazing home church, richland creek! i start wednesday! i'm leading discussion for the middle school girls' bible study! i'm sooo excited! especially because i'm working with dave; he's an awesome man of God...but pretty awkward :) haha
got so frustrated with college and life in NC that i seriously considered getting on a plane to california and just going to live with jordan and dee... :)
vince has been putting up with my constant complaints and need for advice.
i had lunch with one of my friends, josh today; he's one of the prof's sons here at southeastern. we have old testament together. he kind of stepped in as my "big brother" and gave me some advice about college and such, which was quite an encouragement.
and right now i have awoken from attempting to go to bed at 8 due to a headache (which i probably owe to all the stress i've been under recently)...but after a few hours of tossing and turning, i had to finally admit defeat and get up to call my mother. so, i'm almost positive that this blog contains so many grammatical errors that i will probably look back upon this tomorrow and cringe. :)
basically, i started off college in great shape, got a bit sidetracked, but now i'm back at it. :)
but, there you have it. an update. in (more than) a few sentences.
Friday, August 8, 2008
a light for my path
i think Scripture is best "digested" one word at a time. at least, instead of quickly skimming a verse or two here and there, i think it's best to, first and foremost, read the passage in context with the surrounding (and the rest of!) Scripture, and, secondly, to meditate on each word individually, gradually strringing them together (as one would string beads upon a necklace) to create meaning, and eventually viewing the words (and their meanings) as a whole. much like putting together the pieces of a puzzle - you examine the piece at hand individually before you can find what it matches with (and i'm sure that analogy breaks down at some point).
what's interesting about this particular piece of Scripture (psalm 119:105) is the word "light." the hebrew word for "light" here ("Your word is...a LIGHT to my path...") denotes a certain kind of light - a dim light.
imagine this: you are standing in the middle of a black abyss. you feel nothing but the ground beneath your feet. you see nothing but a dimly lit patch of light that shines (dimly :) ) on your feet. there is just enough light to see the ground that you're standing on; not enough light to look behind you to see where you came from and not enough light to see beyond your feet to know where you are going.
we are each on a path. a path to somewhere. we have no choice in the matter. and this path? it's the Light that determines it; it's the Light that carves your path out of the otherwise directionless soild. so, you have three options:
1) you can stand there, in your path. motionless. hopeless. doubtful of the Light. too scared to try. after all, the Light can hurt you. and standing there may feel good for a while - knowing that you can't possibly get hurt by standing still. but, in the end, standing still gets you nowhere and the adventure of your path (all the ups and downs) is no longer a path, but rather an ending in itself.
2) or, you could trust in yourself. but wait. "yourself" has no control over this Light. It has a mind of It's own. undoubtedly, many of us would try to remove ourselves from the situation, claiming, "it's too hard! i can't see where i'm going! this isn't fair! why me, o Light?!," and thus make a failed attempt to back-track in the darkness, back to wherever it was you came. but, how would you know when you got there? it is dark, remember. even if you managed to walk succesfully, without the Light, you'd probably end up walking around in circles without even knowing it. or you could try to rush ahead and just get where you're going! but, you might run into something because you wouldn't be paying attention to the dim light just beyond your toes.
3) finally, you could take a deep breath, putting your trust in and having faith in the Light, and take a step. and then another. slowly, but surely, you'd make your way to wherever it is the Light may take you.
you make the choice who you put your faith in. it's either going to be nothing, you, or the Light. there are no in betweens.
each of our lives are different. we aren't the same and therefore, the Light does not give us identical paths. maybe the Light takes me over rocky path, maybe even mountainous at times, while the Light permits your path to be straight and smooth.
and even the best of friends may have different paths. the Light may take one low and It may zig-zag him about, making him wonder and worry about whether the Light knows what It is doing afterall. his companion, however, may find joy in wakling the path that the Light gives him, which is "smooth sailing," but he is apt to encourage the first that perhaps the Light will eventually even his path out...and, even if It doesn't, the Light knows what It is doing. or maybe even the best of friends seem to have the same paths - they rejoice when the Light has broughten them together over solid ground and lament together (with hope) over rocky soil.
and sometimes the Light allows our paths cross other's paths. maybe briefly or for but just a moment. maybe, just maybe, you'll be lucky enough to find a handful of people to whom the Light has given paths are parallel to yours, headed, side-by-side, in the same direction. you may not be able to see them (it's dark and there is only a dim light illuminating each step you take, remember? :) ), but, somehow, the Light assures you that they're there.
and there will be times where others reach the end of their paths that the Light has given them, and you'll reach yours, too. a few will reach the end of their paths and, by some glorious miracle, will rejoice in their final destination, knowing that the patches of rough terrain were all worth it, and remembering with fondness, the joy of the level terrain. they will thank the Light and enjoy It forever.
most, however, will come to their path's end realizing that they somehow ended up in the darkness, separated from the Light, never to be found again. selfishly thinking they deserved better than the Light could give them, they had rebelled against the light and chose not to follow it, or maybe even stumbled about in the darkness just to spite the Light.
regardless of who we are, we have all, at one point, rebelled against the Light. it's the few of us who eventually figure out we're wrong that joyfully follow the Light and reach the glorious end.
perhaps the ones who rebelled and chose not to follow the Light in the end go around the rocky parts that would have gotten them closer to where the Light wanted them - closer to the glorious end.
but, all's fair. a choice is a limitation, afterall. if you choose one thing, you're choosing to forsake the rest. good or bad, we each chose the outcome of our own path. we can chose to wrecklessly follow ourselves, instead of the Light (afterall, It's only there to help us; It is illuminating and knows the way to the glorious end; we do not), or we can chose to walk in the dimness of the only Light we do have - there is no other Light; there is no other way to salvation from the darkness.

Thursday, August 7, 2008
r-r-r-red robin: yum-m-m :)
in the afternoon, i met one of my suite mates, winter. she's very nice and also a missions major! :) she's a college transfer so she's either a first or second semester sophomore, depending on which of her credits counts here at southeastern. my other suite mate, chelsea, has been here...but i don't think she's here currently. winter told me that she was a missions major, too...so it's pretty neat that four missions majors are sharing a bathroom :) winter went home for the night (back to ashboro), just like i suspect chelsea did.
around 2 i went home to eat some lunch and i ended up crashing on jordan's bed for about two hours :) when i woke up, i headed back to the dorm. my RA, cristy, had told me that it had been one of the girls' birthday this past tuesday and that her room mate was throwing a surprise birthday party for her at seven...so i went to that. cristy and i were the only ones to show up besides the lori (the birthday girl) and her room mate, jacqeline (i think that's how you spell it :) ). we all went to red robin and, despite more than a handful of awkward moments, it was fun! :)
so now i'm sitting here in my dorm, waiting for vince to get off of work at his new job at rocco's italian grill...to blog again another day!
"make new friends but keep the old; one is silver and the other's gold"
as i was approaching the door to my dorm (i had gone home in the morning to shower and pack clothes :) ), i had a surprise waiting for me, hanging from my doorknob! :) my good friend, elizabeth, who is going to liberty in virginia with mandy next week (she's also the daughter of one of the seminary housing staff that hooked me up with an awesome room!), had baked flower shaped cookies for me! (the cookies literally match the flower on the card!)
not wanting to be alone (and with lolley hall practically a ghost town...save the random noises which i cannot so much as hazard a guess as to their origin), i hung out with vince! we went to bojangles, my new food obsession, and talked about life, love, family, missions, and God. it was awesome! i'm so glad that he moved from new jersey to wake forest of all places just to be my best friend! i don't know what i'd do without him!
after i ate (vince is a yankee and doesn't appreciate the finer things in life, such as the combination of fried chicken, buscuits, sweet tea, and seasoned fries :) ), we played frisbee at southeastern and were later joined up with by my "first southeastern friend," ryan. this was the first time, admittedly, that i met the alabamian ryan...but he was very nice...and talkative! haha then we went to happy hour at sonic and all was right with the world :)
i was reluctant to head back to my dorm because i didn't want to be sad and alone...so within ten minutes of dropping vince off at his house, he selflessly agreed to hang out with me...again. i don't know how he puts up with me, but he does! we went to falls dam and talked. he gave me quite the pep talk; vince is always good for that kind of stuff.
this is a night light that vince made for me from a trash can :) it's supposed to scare away my room mate if she ever acts crabby to me :) haha
my palm tree and my glowing trash can night light :)
luckily, i had plans to go see the sisterhood of the traveling pants 2 with some friends that graduated high school with me. it was a really good movie; the right mix of comedy, romance, and inspiration to put me in an optomistic mood about things :) although, it did make me "homesick" for greece, being that the last scenes of the movie were filmed in santorini! i can't wait to go back with my church this summer! hopefully, i'll be bringing vince with me, too!
i went home for a while to finish some laundry (and mooch off of my parents for dinner!) and catch up on facebook :) and i've been cleaning and organizing my dorm...including decorating amie (my room mate) and i's message board on our door and our mirrors :) i can't wait until she comes on friday!
anyway, i'm going to bed soon...i'm hanging around the dorm tomorrow to see if i can meet some new people! (that is, if they ever decide to move in! :) )
my friend ashley, who's going to wake tech (so i'm glad she'll be sticking around :) ), gave me a flip book of index cards with Bible verses and quotes and stuff and this one really sticks out to me, so i figured i'd share it...
"let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile."
-mother teresa
ah, words of wisdom. the world could use a lot more kindness.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
here, there, and everywhere
apart from measuring ingredients (which is quite a reach in itself) and pouring them into a bowl or container of some sort, i am completely clueless when it comes to preparing food...that's edible. i mean, when mandy and i made pasta yesterday, i had one job to do: heat up the rolls. unfortunately, the tops of the rolls came out a little singed :) my lack of cooking skill is the reason why i chose to forgo making dinner by myself last night - at least until some odd hour way past dinner time when i could go down to the kitchen and stumble my way through heating up a lean cuisine frozen dinner :) (i don't think the public that is all of the occupants of lolley hall are ready for my solo cooking debut :) ) taking pity on me, mandy invited me over to her house for dinner...where we had a very healthy mix of chicken strips, buscuits, and fries...from bojangles :)
it's nice living in wake forest...especially because my two best friends live there (one, not for much longer :( ) and i would venture to say that my place is almost exactly half-way between the two, which makes it convenient to "house hop." :) oddly enough, i recently found out that the two of them both share the same house number, 2801. but anyway...i love my two best friends. they've been very understanding and compasionate about my moving from (insert a semi decent adjective here) rolesville to wake forest, taking me in and giving me a "home away from home." also, i can (and do) show up in my pajamas :)
after eating bojangles last night at mandy's (which i think just may become my next food obsession...goodbye, chicken taco salad!), i went to the casbarro house to play guitar hero and watch wipeout with vince. after vince beat me (surprise, surprise) in a few rounds of GH, we watched a pretty disappointing episode of wipeout (basically, a recap of the season so far).
then we went to goodberry's for ice cream and ran into anthony, my thirty something friend from the greece trip. anthony makes me jealous, plain and simple. :) he's been all over the world (mexico, india, israel, greece, and coming soon...brazil!), sharing the free gift of salvation in Christ. he also informed me that dr. catanzaro, team leader and biblical counseling professor at southeastern, who has lived in brazil for a few years, told the team that brazil is the most beautiful place you will ever see. anthony also told me that the brazil team has one open spot because someone dropped out...making me envious of the lucky guy or gal that takes their place. i had a dream about a year ago, while i was taking intro. to missions at southeastern that made me think about going on this trip...but that's a story for another day. :)
right now, i'm at home, washing clothes, and getting ready to shower. the shower in my dorm is not so desirable :)
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
officially a "college girl"
my "first southeastern friend," ryan (a freshman from alabama, who i actually have not met yet...but he seems nice :) ), put it best when he asked me last night, "what you got planned tomorrow as the first day as a college girl?" then it hit me. i am now officially a "college girl!" :)
so, for my first night in my dorm as a "college girl," i did the "college girl" thing...i stayed up to see the coming of the next day :) after enjoying some much-needed time with the family at my grandfather's birthday party, i quickly re-visited my house to pick up a few things essential to not only survive, but to thrive in the night at hand...namely, my miniature palm tree with christmas lights :)
around 9, vicky came over to help me carry in enough groceries to feed a small army...or enough to completely conceal the backseat of my car :) after dumping said groceries (carefully) on my room mate's vacant bed, we headed off to chick-fil-a for dinner...at 9:17 pm, thus providing confirmation that i am, indeed, now a "college girl." :)
after vicky left, i spent a good amount of time talking to mandy, one of my best friends since the third grade, and vince, one of my "newer" best friends. i had to practically force myself to get off the computer to start making preparations to go to sleep. after all, it was about 2 am and i knew i had to wake up early the next morning to make the oh so long travel home to shower and pick up a couple other things i'd left behind...
my bed (i had to switch sides of the room because my room mate wanted the bed near the wall, which works out because i secretly wanted the bed near the window, but i wanted to be nice and give her what i thought was the "best bed")
my fuzzy blue rug at the foot of my bed
the view from our window
the mirror on the back of our door has a bible verse written on it; lamentations 3:22-23:
"The unfailing love of the Lord never ends! By His mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is His faithfulness, His mercies begin afresh each day!"
but the most memorable thing about my first night in my dorm? i had an awesome time praying and reading my Bible between 2 and 2:20 this morning. despite the occasional, resounding shutting of a door (the walls are paper thin here...and i do live with about fifty other college girls that, likewise, do not grace the bed with their presence until 3 am) it was quiet and peaceful; enough to calm my nerves and quench my anxieties about starting a new adventure in my life.
i woke up a little before my alarm went off obnoxiously and promptly at 8 am to the rays of the rising sunshine peeking in through the blinds of my window and the gentle hum of wake forest commuting to work. i threw on some clothes and went home to shower and transfer more of my belongings from my old home to my new home.
mandy came over around 10:30 to admire my room (she's going to liberty in lynchburg, virginia, where everything closes at nine, the dorm rooms are smaller, and one recieves reprimands for attending dances). we made lunch; some sort of italian butter and herb noodles and rolls! i sent pictures of this miracle to my mom and to my doubtful best friend, vince :) of course, it was in the process of cooking that i realized i had no big metal spoon to stir the pasta with...so we made due, rotating between a small plastic spoon and a tablespoon on one of those rings with all the different sized spoons :) we had lots of left-overs...so we gave them to vince, who, being a teenaged boy, we can always trust to dispose of large quantities of food in a heartbeat :) unfortunately, vince had already eaten lunch and didn't exactly like the plasticity of our now cold (and sculptable) pasta :)
chef mandy in the kitchen, cooking pasta! she burnt her finger stirring the pasta and i burned my lip taste testing :)
our creation!
vince and i spent the afternoon praying at binkley and hanging out. he surprised me with a moving in present - a fuzzy yellow blanket from his sweet mother...and a night light that he made out of a trash can, serving to scare my room mate when i find it necessary :)
and now, i'm sitting in my dorm, typing this...about to have my quiet time and go to vince's house at 7:30 to play guitar hero and watch wipeout :) tomorrow i'm going to see the sisterhood of the traveling pants 2 at the movies with some good friends from high school and thursday, i'm thinking about going shag dancing with some southeastern friends in the master's program.
though it's been fun, it's been a very tiring day...i think i am going to become a coffee "college girl" very soon... :)